cheers.

the photograph of before in color:

he moves into a new apartment three blocks up the street from the old one
&claims that this will be a brand new start.
but she still comes over & he still can't find a reason to get out of bed each morning.

call off the search: i am finally numb.

he hangs up the clothes he's worn for years, but a new closet revives the patterns.
the silverware is in a new drawer, therefore it is different.
fresh.

when did we become so complacent?

i came back to my friends but they're all the same.
they're all the same.
each kiss is the last, each tear makes him stronger, &each sunrise is the same.
they're all the same.

my lips are made of smoke.

the photograph of after in black&white:

the kings&queens of awesome town are establishing residency.
royalty flocks.
here lies the defining line between loneliness & decision,
housing deal breakers & meal makers.

week-old friends can't put a finger to my face, year-old love is stitched to my heart,
&we all spend days like cold, hard cash.

star-shaped slivers of paper are in the air in this room
&i grab at them as if they were pendants.
medals of honor.
tokens of victory.
a conquered city.

we long for the rain & for high-rise buildings
but we give directions in the sun & sleep in fake winter.

the kids build makeshift castles in the sandbox in the backyard
as the rest of us are lost in a circle of words & hands on the ceiling.

goodbye to the most defining year of my existence.
greetings to guaranteed awesome.